MEGA BLOG POST OF DOOM (and happiness)

Alright so I have a bunch of thoughts that are too short to go into blog posts by themselves so I just kinda combined them all into one...let's hope this turns out well

So blog news: apparently I actually have viewers O_O YAY my little stats bar says Im getting most of my views from Canada with a whopping 48 views (well...I'm actually in Canada so...most of those views are me hitting my handy dandy refresh button to see if I got anymore views) hi Canadians ^_^, 6 views from America hi Americans ^_^, and 1 view from Singapore...meaning YES WE DID IT WE'VE GONE INTERCONTINENTAL  hi Singaporean ^_^, thanks for the support everyone I didn't expect views for weeks I hope you guys liked my blog thus far...and if you didn't then you'll probably not come back so you'll never receive my thanks making me the winner either way so checkmate BOOM HEADSHOT (but please come back...I'm so lonely T_T) ALSO in other news...this blog...can now be found using Google Search Engine YEA WE DID IT W0000T now if you just type in "Elbow to the face" we appear sometime after the 39th page mainly because of Obama's recent elbow to the face during some basketball game...in hindsight I probably searched up the blog name before I actually made it (for those of you wondering, no I didn't name my blog because of that incident the name comes from a joke I used to say a couple of years back), I'm sure the news will eventually blow over leaving my blog in the top 30 pages...I hope...HOWEVER if you type in "http://elbowtotheface.blogspot.com/" into google were the very first entry...meaning I'm at the top of Google after only a week of blogging *_* (yes complete disillusion is a wonderful thing everyone should try it)

I knew I shouldn't have taken the bus today...

High School of the Dead (after finishing)
So yea I finished the anime in like 2 days, half because I was at home sick (any tips for getting over a cold?) and half because IT WAS SO AWESOME O_o, it proved to be more then a pair of tits wrapped around a gun...its a pair of tits wrapped around a gun, a bokken, a baseball bat, a decent plot, plenty of emotion and of course a pair of bewbs, this is definitely an anime to watch if you feel like there hasn't been anything good out since Dragonball Z...and even then the reruns killed it, it's one of those animes though I'd recommend watching along with a comedy just to avoid major depression and paranoid thoughts about your weird ass neighbour being a zombie but you probably won't be able to since after you watch one episode you'll just want to watch the next one, this is one anime where youll regret not being able to speak Japanese just so you won't miss a second of the action and boobs while reading the subtitles o_O

Panty And Stocking (With Garterbelt)
Think Powerpuff Girls on A MASSIVE AMOUNT OF COCAINE, this anime is so mind blowing-ly random that I need to make up a new word for it "Frivolous"...wait that's taken...Fan...sa..me..ri FANSAMERI

Fansameri: (Fan-sa-meh-ri)
Adjective, Noun, Verb, Adverb, Sentence
1. To be Mindblowing-ly random
2. A kind of cheese

Oxford Dictionary HERE I COME *_*, this anime has like 2 stories in a single episode, kinda like Spongebob with apparently no real plot connecting them (only watched one episode but...I kinda got the point), in short this is an anime a man can  watch to get some comedy in without having to worry about any of it actually making sense

Dead or Alive Live Action Movie (2006)
Hot girls doing Martial Arts, and their not two dimensional!....I'll have to give this 2 thumbs and another appendage up

The word "efficacy"
Alright I'm not entirely sure what set me off about this word. Maybe it's the way it sounds ef-fi-ca-cy, sounds like a sex act that is illegal in every state except Hawaii and even then only on Tuesdays. Or maybe it's because every dictionary has the same way of wording the definition "the capacity to produce an effect" (this one's from wiki if your asking), sounds sketchier then a mother fucker, your telling me no other dictionary could find another way of putting that how about "the ability to do stuff" don't that sound friendlier. This word keeps popping up in my "Health Counselling and Behaviour Change" course and it's annoying because under synonyms a much better word appears "potency" I think if the prof used this word instead, the problem of world hunger would be solved. And with that last sentence thus ends part 1 of my idiosyncrasy (which btw is also a very very nice word...).

Infinite Stratos
Alright so I'm gonna do this review in REAL TIME (ie: I'll watch the episode while writing the review) so this is the new mecha anime and I'm a man that believes you need to watch something involving giant robots fighting each other atleast once every 5 years (you know...to avoid impotence) started out with a good fight scene but without much context I'm hoping it's kinda like Zoids...ohhh how I miss Zoids considering everyone's smiling in the OP it can only mean A) they're not in a Gundam war  OR B) they're psychotic. *time elapses* alright so they just said that their robots are only used for competition w00t. *time elapses* alright having finished the first episode I think the anime will turn out pretty good the main character(and appears to be the only guy) in the anime isn't emo, wimpy or a trap, the humour is good, the art is good, there's some ecchi without it being over the top, and best of all only 12 episodes apparently leaving very little time to get tired of it.

Alright thats the end of my mega blog post, I kinda liked it so I'll probably end up doing it again, tell me what you guys think

Like Frankie Said I Did It My Way,
Asaya HelwaEhwee

High School Of The Dead

Oh he's only robbing you ^_^

So the plot is zombie apocalypse mixed with thousands of inappropriately placed panty shots...now don't get me wrong I like panty shots as much as the next guy but during a zombie fight? it just feels weird like doing a round house kick with your left leg while doing an elbow with your right arm (nows a good time to say I'm not responsible for any injuries caused by someone trying this at home...that's natural selections fault =D) I always liked the Love Hina kind of panty shots personally is all I'm saying

while watching High School of the Dead many philosophical issues are raised like if your about to turn into a zombie is it right to kill yourself before hand? or if your being chased by a zombie is it right to push your friend down? or if your friend pushed you down while being chased by zombies and you somehow manage to escape and find him again how many free beers will it take for you to forgive your friend?

After watching the first episode of High School of The Dead it got me thinking again about what I would do during a zombie apocalypse...grab a katana, run for the nearest walmart, and change the sign to say "O'Asaya's Giant Pub" which would hopefully attract enough angry drunks to build a colony that could fight off any approaching zombies (unless there are drunk zombies too @_@)

So what would you guys do in a zombie apocalypse?

*insert creative pre signature thing here*,
Asaya HelwaEhwee

Bartender

He's smiling because he's drunk ^_^

Alright I decided to do a review on something I actually liked so you (you being my imaginary friends) don't think of me as a pessimistic bastard (even though I am ^_T)

So what I like is....Bartender...THAT'S RIGHT I SAID IT,I AM NOT ASHAMED

The anime is about a bartender who's nicknamed "The Glass of the Gods" that helps people with his magic alcoholic drinks, theres no actual plot to it it's just the individual stories of alcoholics to be

Customer #1

I don't know why Bartender got such a bad rap, maybe it's because nothing happens until 15 minutes into the episode where the bartender makes a drink using special CGI graphics

OH SNAP HE MADE A GRASSHOPPER!

Regardless of it's slow timing, the slice of life anime that proves that alcohol can fix all your problems leaves you feeling filled (and sometimes bloated) and gives you the urge to call your ex-girlfriend to tell her you don't need her (cause me and my right hand are better off without you woman you were just getting in the way O_O)

Concluding I think this would have to be the best slice of life anime I've ever seen...mainly because the only other slice of life anime I've seen was....*looking through slice of life anime list*...wtf Air Gear is slice of life? when the hell was the last time you got on your motorized roller blades and did back flips around the town battling other people with other motorized roller blades...dammit even if we had motorized roller blades nobody would be allowed to ride them remember how much trouble "Heelys" shoes caused?

OH NOOOEEESS

But yea Bartender was good

I'm gonna go drink a Guinness now,
Asaya HelwaEhwee

Everybody's Fine (2009)

I know what your thinking...hey this isn't anime! and if your thinking that then FUCK YOU AND THE ROCK YOU CAME OUT FROM UNDER....nah I'm kidding ^_T please don't leave the blog....I beg of you T_T (speaking of which I finally got a page viewer counter thing...it said 19 people...I've only visited my own site 18 times MEANING there's someone out there reading this besides me and if you are you should comment so we know you exist and it no longer looks like I'm talking to myself like a schizophrenic)

Moving on with the movie so it's about a guy (Robert De Niro), he's like 60 or whatever and his wife recently died who like kept tabs on all the kids apparently, so now its been years since he's talked to his kids and he goes across country to give em a surprise visit...now here's the plot twist none of his kids really want to talk to him and one of them is in prison in Mexico or something

Now don't get wrong I love Robert De Niro he's a badass mofo but this movie sucked for what it was advertising...I was promised a comedy-drama I assumed that meant that comedy and drama would be there in equal parts so I went to sit down to watch it with my mother promising here some form of laughter in the movie...

THERE IS NO LAUGHTER IN THIS MOVIE after awhile this conversation happened:

Mom: When is it gonna get funny
Asaya:...any minute now mom
Mom: There's 10 minutes left in the movie!
Asaya:...yea well there gonna be the funniest 10 minutes of your life
Mom:...*punches Asaya in the face*

I don't mind it be a drama but freakin advertise it as a drama the movie shouldn't even be called "Everybody's Fine" it should be called "Everybody's Gonna Die A Horrible Death After Their Long and Miserable Life"

Seriously half way through the movie Robert De Niro almost gets robbed and I was like damn now this movie is sad and unrealistic. YOU CAN'T ROB ROBERT DE NIRO HE'S A BADASS MOFO he'd bust so many caps up your ass you'd question your sexual preferences

But regardless I'm at my uni campus now so I'm gonna cut this post short, in the end we should all watch "Analyze This" again.

PS: Question to anyone reading (if there is anyone reading...) what's better short blog posts are long blog posts (sexual innuendo not intended)

Hey You Want what With Me, Ima Tell You One Time Don't Fuck With Me,
Asaya HelwaEhwee

Tite Kubo Keeps Bleach Going For Another 10 Years O_O

Da fuck you want Kubo? My Money? Here you go ^_T

Now I know this news is a couple of weeks old...and I didn't do any research on it mainly because that would make this blog a little more professional...and no one wants that =D

So apparently in an interview Tite Kubo said that Bleach will continue for at least another ten years...are you insane Tite?! you ran out of original ideas after the first Hollow appeared you think you can keep this shit coming for a whole decade more?!

Seriously whats up with this new arc he has. After *spoilers* Ichigo kicked Aizen's ass in an epic battle *end of spoilers* that was the perfect time to end it, the world was at peace, Ichigo lost his powers so he could finally settle down with that big boobed annoying chick and we can all concentrate on watching Naruto end but NOOOO now were stuck with an arc where the most interesting conversation they've had thus far is about RAMEN

WTFFFFFF

After reading so many of these chapters I can only conclude that this arc will end with Ichigo having to use his knowledge of dating sims games to get the evil spirits out of women then he fights Emily Rose and dies....then he must find the Dragon Balls in his shinigami form to get his body back...or at least that would make for a more entertaining story line.

I got blisters on me fingers,
Asaya HelwaEhwee

The World God Only Knows

So this was brought to my attention by a friend of mine...and if your reading this anonymous friend who shall forever remain anonymous...then fuck you...nah I kid Justin...I mean anonymous...

Getting back to the topic at hand the story is about some loser that calls himself the god of dating sims games and all his classmates think he's weird cause he won't do normal kid stuff like...not play dating sims games. But regardless he receives a challenge to play the ultimate dating sims game or something like that and turns out the challenge came from Hell (cause you know Hades has nothing better to do with his time then to challenge children with no actual talents)

well he accepts and now he has to make these real life girls fall in love with him so he can get the evil spirits out of em...so I guess their possessed then @_@...I talked to some possessed chicks back in my day...or atleast they seemed possessed when they were yelling "STOP WATCHING ANIME AND DO SOMETHING WITH YOUR LIFE" to which I responded "GET AWAY FROM ME DEMON WOMAN THE POWER OF INUYASHA COMPELS YOU" and then she left ^_^ ah Inuyasha how you never fail me.

Getting back to the topic at hand so yea he has to use his dating sims talents in order to make them fall in love with him...speaking from personal experience that shit does not work I don't know how many times Ive gone up to women and said "I'm a mysterious lost puppy dog that looks tough only to protect himself from getting hurt any further LOOK AT ME *_*" and it always ends the same way...oh pepper spray how you never fail them T_T.

>

So yea somehow it works for him and I got through 8 episodes of this because I believed that "dating sims" meant "hentai game visual novel" and eventually I would get CGs but no...it doesn't work that way T_T (but on the bright side now that I said the word hentai I can tag it so I get millions of views from perverts LIKE YOU O_O...nice to meet you though I am one of your kind ^_^)

(^this describes your situation perfectly)

Regardless I can only assume that in the last episode he faces Emily Rose...and then he dies because thats the only logical way this can end  O_O

It's a Trap,
Asaya HelwaEhwee